I Was Sick
Three days ago I was sick. Why’s that so important to you that you had to haul me down here? I was with my wife and my two kids when they weren’t in school. You ask her, she’ll say I was sick. It was the kind of sick you don’t get out of bed for days. The flu, I guess. I didn’t go to work, I stayed in bed. Yes, I’m over it now. I had a fever but it’s been gone since this morning. You ask her, she’ll say. I felt good ‘til you brought me down here to this dump. Sorry, but it is.
No, I know what I’m here about. You want to know about that damn robbery, dontcha? Well, I’ll tell you everything but you should know that I was sick. Henry and Stew came down for a visit near two weeks ago. I gave ‘em coffee and we watched the game. Yes, the football game, man, will you listen? They came by and made a proposal like, you know, we’re planning a loot will yah do it with us? What did I say? Well, hell, I can’t say I didn’t think about it. I’m a damn janitor at my kids’ elementary school. I got three of ‘em, they’re still young, and a little freakin’ house. You take a guess as to whether or not I said yes.
Well, I took a look at my life and sure it’s a shithole, sorry for my words, but I’m the one that makes the money. My family would be nowhere without me so I said no instead. Stop staring at me like that. I don’t appreciate it. I’m helping you all I can here. Where’d I get what? Oh, this? Nice little trinket ain’t it? This little timepiece was, well, given to me. Yeah, given to me. By who? My…wife, for Christmas, you ask her and she’ll tell you she got me this and I was sick. How do I know she’d say that? How do I know? Are you crazy? Of course I know, I know ‘cause I said I know, okay?
Okay, I apologize. I’ll go on. Yes, hold your horses, where was I? Right, well, Henry and Stew, they’re big men from up the road and they were none too happy about me sayin’ no. I’m the fast one, you see. I don’t get to eat much on account of my family needs to eat first. No, I eat of course, but my kids are growin’ and they get more, I get less. So I’m the runner, they’re the scary burglars. That’s their plan. I told them boys sorry I couldn’t do nothing, but if I wanted more money I’d make it the honest way. Yes I’m serious! What? A man as poor like me can’t have a good and moral head on his shoulders?
Well, no. They told me when and where the burglary would be. I was damn well aware. Well, sure I could of reported the damn thing, but they, well, yah see, they told me if I said anything they’d kill me. Yes, they’d kill me. What is it with you, what I say isn’t good enough? Well I tell yah now, the robbery happened two weeks later just like I said and it was them boys that did it and not me. You ask my wife, I was home with my damn kids, in bed, with the flu. You hear? I was sick and Henry and Stew did it. And that’s all I’m saying ‘til I get myself a damn lawyer, that I was sick.
Tuesday, February 27, 2007
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