Critical Response to Just What I Like to Overhear

Author: Ken Lustenberger
Critical Response by: Shabeg Sekhon
Just What I Like To Overhear
Comments:
I don’t know what the intentions were for this story but I was pretty confused. I lost track of who was talking and why. I also couldn’t figure out what the story was about. Are these guys mafia type guys? If so, what was up with Jody and the printer early in the story? Why was the boss looking over Fly’s file? I couldn’t get a sense of who these guys were, there was no character development. Overall, I think this story needs a story around the dialogue.
I really want to know who Fly and his Boss are. I think that character development of these two guys in any way would strengthen the story that when they finally talk we can actually understand them and even care about them. Why are they meeting at this restaurant? Why do they always go to this restaurant? What is the significance of the waiter’s part in the dialogue?
Another thing I want to discuss is the reason for their conversation. If these guys have known each other for 23 years why is the boss asking about his wife and kids. Are these guys not really friends? Is there relationship strictly business? What kind of business are these guys in? I think these are the imperative elements of the story that we need to know in order to understand what is going on in the story.
I think this story can be viewed from various perspectives. One could be from Fly’s perspective and that we get a deeper understanding of who he is and the conversation in the restaurant could be at the end of the story. Another perspective could be from the Boss and we could get a better understanding of his business and why he needs to fire this guy he has hired since March of 1969. Another approach could be from a third person and that we can view these two guys from the lens of a camera or from a window. Whatever approach you wish to take, I ultimately want to know what is going on with these two men. What are they doing and why are they doing it? What is the conflict? Why has Fly been slipping up, what about his age is making him less useful for working for the Boss? But basically, I would like the story to give me a reason to care for what is going on.